


The Thaumification of Darcy Lewis

by qwanderer



Series: Midnight Mystery [14]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), The Avengers (2012), Thor (2011)
Genre: Gen, M/M, Magic, Mischief, oops I trousered my timeline, what happens when Loki is bored
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-14
Updated: 2013-01-15
Packaged: 2017-11-14 05:58:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,959
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/512061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/qwanderer/pseuds/qwanderer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Loki was bored. This worried Tony.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Midnight Mystery, Misery, Mischief, and Misdirection

**Author's Note:**

> I have accidentally trousered my timeline. This takes place in a slightly different universe in which Darcy was never invited to that party at the end of Better Mischief Through Science.

Loki was bored.

This worried Tony.

Tony had been rather distracted by his moon hotel project and the new company associated with it, Stark Vistas. Loki had grown tired of making arc pods and had been alternately pacing, and pouncing on Tony to drag him away from his work, to bed and often eventually to sleep and to eat. It was a very good thing for Tony, but, he realized, as he watched Loki shift restlessly in his sleep, it was a very bad sign for Loki. The god of chaos was not meant to be domesticated.

When Loki woke up, Tony was staring at him with his full attention. 

"What?" the frost giant asked. "Am I unusual looking or something?"

Tony smiled at that, running his fingers over his lover's exotic blue skin, tracing the ridges on his forehead. 

"Nope. Perfectly mundane. Nothing unusual about you."

"Then why," said Loki, "do you stare?"

"You are bored," said Tony. "You need to be plotting something."

"I am tired of harmless pranks," Loki said ruefully.

"Then maybe it's time you got back to causing some serious chaos."

"Loki, God of Mischief is dead. Midnight Mystery is an Avenger. He would not do such things."

Tony scoffed. "Have you seen some of the things I've gotten up to? Or the Hulk? Avengers are forces of chaos. That's why you fit in so well." Tony looked at the unimpressed expression on Loki's face and sighed. "My darling chameleon. I know you like to play your roles to the hilt. But that's just what gets you into trouble. Everyone knows I'm more than just a superhero; I'm also a troublemaker. And you're too much like me to stick to the side of the angels."

"People can change."

"I know that," said Tony. "Believe me, I know that. But I need _you_ to know that you don't have to. Not for me. You're unhappy. You're bored. So go have some fun. Please." Tony laughed. "You're wearing out Earth's most infamous playboy. That takes a lot of excess energy."

Loki put his face into his pillow and groaned.

"What?"

"I was actually quite fond of Midnight Mystery's pristine image. But you are correct. I am bored."

Tony smirked. "I thought you were suposed to be good at deception."

"Large scale chaos is somewhat more difficult to hide."

"Then don't hide. Misdirect."

Loki slowly began to smile.

The average person would have begun quaking in their boots. But this was Tony Stark.

"Welcome back, honey," he said, echoing the smile.


	2. Avengers, Aliases, Anthropology, and Awkwardness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Darcy meets the Avengers

Darcy was going to be in New York for a week, and she had begged Jane to get her a tour of the tower and meet the Avengers. Jane and Thor were showing her around one Sunday. She squealed at everything, even for some reason the buttons in the elevator. She squealed the loudest when they walked into HQ and Clint and Steve were there, playing Mario Galaxy (Steve took his starbit collecting duties seriously).

Clint paused the game. "Who _is_ that?" he said, rubbing at his ear in mock pain. "Are we inviting fangirls in now?"

"Clint, be nice," said Jane.

"My friends!" Thor boomed. "Meet Darcy! When I first came to Earth, she bested me with a mighty but tiny weapon. Earth makes such marvelous tiny things!"

"Really?" said Clint, much more interested now.

"It was just a taser," Jane said. "She's not a hero or anything. Not like you guys."

"Hey, speak for yourself, Jane of the Jungle. I took down the mighty Thor." Darcy made muscle arms, but then Captain America walked over. 

"Nice to meet you, Miss," said Steve, holding out a hand for her to shake. 

"Wow," Darcy said, staring at him, and her hands drifted vaguely downward. Steve decided just to grasp the appropriate hand and shake it. 

"Wow, so you're Captain America," she managed. "Gosh, you're even hunkier in person."

"Uh, thank you? At least I hope that's a positive adjective. I'm not really familiar with it."

"Oh my gosh, definitely!" She grinned like a fool. "Oh, hey," she said, apparently remembering how to converse. "I'm in the city interviewing for a job at the Journal of Sociocultural Anthropology, and I would love to do a piece on you. You know, how you're adjusting to life in the information age, what kind of changes you notice most, stuff like that."

"Oh great," said Clint. "She's press. I draw the line at press, they're worse than fangirls."

"How dare you!" Darcy scowled at him. " _I_ am a scholar. Consider the anthropological value of my work."

Jane laughed. "If nothing else, I trained you well in the vocabulary of indignant scientists."

"Well, I've already given a lot of interviews," Steve began, and Darcy pouted at him. "But for a friend of Thor's, I would be happy to." It was true; he couldn't help but smile at the way her face lit up. 

"Excellent!" she said. "Now all I have to do is get the job!"

Tony and Loki appeared then from around the corner where the elevator lay.

"Jarvis tells me there's a nosy reporter in my tower, prying interviews out of the Avengers and claiming to know Thor," Tony said, smiling. "Seen anyone like that?"

"What, little old me?" Darcy said, feigning innocence extremely badly. "No, Sir, Mr. Stark, Sir."

"So how did you meet our resident Asgardian prince?"

"Oh you know. Watched him fall out of the sky. Tased him. Watched him eat his weight in breakfast foods. Made him a fake ID. We bonded." Darcy elbowed Thor in a companionable way. Then her eyes moved to Loki. "Who's this?"

Thor responded, "My b- uh, Midnight Mystery."

"I'm not in costume, Thor. Joshua is fine," Loki reminded him.

"I do not understand why one person needs so many names," complained Thor. 

Darcy didn't appear to have noticed the slip. "So you're the new Avenger," she said, her eyes still on Loki. "What's up with your skin?"

"My skin is much like yours, essentially translucent," Loki replied. "My blood, however, is a deep blue."

"Why?"

"I am not human. I was born on another planet."

"A third one? Not Asgard?"

"Not Asgard," he agreed.

"Wow. What's it like?"

"I am not as obliging as Captain Rogers. I don't give interviews, not even to pretty young anthropologist friends of Thor." He smiled, amused. 

"Yeah, well, I guess my charms are pretty useless here. It's all over the interwebs that you two..." Darcy pointed at Tony and Loki, and made a dirty hand motion. Tony smiled lewdly in response. "It's too bad, really," Darcy continued. "You aren't bad looking for an old guy and a blue guy." She turned to Tony. "What about you? Still like to be interviewed by pretty women? Or is it a 'once you go whatever-he-is you never go back' kind of thing?"

"Oh-kayy, Darcy," Jane interrupted. "I said you could meet the Avengers, not that you could ask them embarrassingly inappropriate questions in front of me."

They all stood in slightly awkward silence for a moment, but then Natasha walked in.

The way she was acting was frankly eerie. Well, to Steve, Jane and Thor. Darcy had never met her before and so didn't notice anything strange. Tony and Clint recognized the persona after a brief moment of shock.

The Natasha who introduced herself to Darcy had wide, innocent eyes, and a voice verging on whisper-quiet. She smiled at Darcy as if she'd like nothing better than to oblige the girl in anything she wanted. "It's so nice to meet a fan," she told Darcy brightly.

"The only person who hasn't showed now is Bruce," Tony said. "He's probably wrapped up in some experiment down in the labs." Tony's expression was speculative.

"If you want to go annoy the Hulk I'd totally come watch," Darcy said.

"Always," Tony replied with a grin.

Loki followed as well. This might have promise.

As they walked towards the elevator Darcy could be heard saying, "I probably shouldn't tase him though. Totally lucked out with Thor. What kind of thunder god..." and the rest was lost to the elevator doors.

Clint turned to Tasha and said, "So what was up with that, _Natalie?_ Haven't seen you bring out that persona in a while. I thought you liked to intimidate fans a little."

Natasha sighed. "Natalie was designed for interaction with a certain type of person. Specifically, people like Tony. Most people keep their distance once they realize I intimidate them. Tony? It would only have encouraged him. I get the same vibe from her. She gets out of her depth? She thoroughly enjoys it. And I don't particularly want a gaggle of sophomoric stalkers."

Clint looked at her with slight confusion. "I thought the first thing you did when you met Tony was K.O. his driver in a boxing ring."

Tasha shrugged. "Well I was supposed to get close. Didn't want to seem _too_ boring."

Clint chuckled. 


	3. Darcy, Drinks, Distractions and Disaster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Shit."

Tony, Loki and Darcy arrived in the lab and turned on Bruce with near identical expressions. "Shit," Bruce muttered to himself.

He rolled his chair to the opposite bench and his hands found a warm mug of tea. As he looked up from sipping it he managed to regard the three approaching mischief makers with equanimity.

"What are you two up to and who else are you dragging into it."

Tony grinned. "What kind of question is that. Doctor Banner, let me introduce Darcy Lewis. She's a friend of Thor and Jane."

Well, she looked human enough at least, even if she was that most dangerous of things, an attractive brunette who wouldn't intimidate easily. (Come to think of it, all three of them invading his lab were that.)

"Any super powers I should be aware of?"

"Nope, but I did take down Thor once," she said.

Yep, definitely not the running away type.

"You're not ever letting that one go, are you?" Tony teased her.

"Excuse me but how many times have you pulled the 'privatized world peace' card? There are entire gifsets of you saying it, all with _different ties._ "

Loki chuckled softly. Tony took the opportunity to throw a glance his way. Mild-mannered Joshua was still pretty well in place but Tony could see gears turning behind his eyes.

Darcy pulled a bottle of some kind of fancy water out of her bag and took a drink.

"You know, you really shouldn't eat in a bio lab, Miss Lewis," Bruce said.

"Tea." She gestured to his beverage.

"I'm a special case. The damage has already been done. The priority is controlling it. By any means necessary. Even drinking in a bio lab."

"That's not very fair."

Bruce was about to argue, but instead he sipped his tea again and sighed. "Well, keep it to this bench. The others are off limits."

Just then a machine in the opposite corner of the enormous room began to beep.

"What? That shouldn't be..." Bruce began, distracted. Then, taking a final glance at the workspace behind him, he rushed to quiet the machine. 

Tony followed curiously, and Loki on Tony's heels. Darcy was going to follow, but something caught her eye on the workbench Bruce had been using when they had entered.

It was glowing.

And _hovering._

In fact, as she walked closer, she realized that if she had to classify the tiny figure, she would call it a fairy.

"No way," she breathed. "Drinking in the bio lab probably wasn't the best idea," she continued, rubbing her eyes.

"Absolutely not," the fairy said. "Terrible idea, really. I mean, unless you want some superpowers to go with your hallucinations. Then you could probably stand to drink a little something more."

"Really," she said. "Fairies are notoriously tricky. I read a lot of folklore after I switched majors for anthropology."

"Look at this vial," the fairy said. "The label says 'ready for human trials' on it. Isn't that fascinating?"

"Maybe you put that there," Darcy said.

"And maybe I put poison in your vitamin water," the fairy said mockingly. "No, the reason I'm talking to you at all is that I want to give you a choice."

Darcy's mouth scrunched up in thought.

"So what kind of superpowers are we talking here?"

"Sorcery," the fairy said. "Like Thor, but you're sharp enough to learn a few tricks he never bothered with. Like Midnight Mystery, minus the ice powers."

Darcy contemplated the vial. 'Ready for human trials' rather did look like 'DRINK ME,' if you squinted. 

"Do you think Dr. Banner will get angry? Not that I'd normally care, it's just, you know, Hulk."

"He has been more curious about the effects of this formula than anyone. I'm sure he'll get over it."

Darcy figured that there was a fairy, and either she was dreaming, or there really was more magic floating around than just what that Myul-myuh thing had in it. And sure, she wanted a piece of it. 

She downed the bottle.

"Son of a bitch," she bit as the formula began to take effect, burning in her veins. "I don't wanna be a sparkly bloodsucker." It intensified. So did the volume and severity of her swears. She crumpled. 

A scientist, an engineer and a sorcerer all came at a run. Bruce took her pulse and picked up the empty vial. Tony took off his jacket and folded it under her head. Loki held a hand over her, lightly glowing and moving as if scanning, and his eyes looked intently _through_ her.

"FUCK! Fuck. Fucking _cookie elves,_ " she said, regaining some sort of control over the words spilling out of her mouth. "That fucking _hurt_ and I didn't even get any fudge stripes."

"What?" Tony said at her apparent nonsense. "What happened?"

"Cross-dimensional formula H," said Bruce, holding up the empty vial.

Tony shot a look at Loki, who was looking on with what appeared to be mild concern. Then he looked back at Darcy, who was now simply breathing. 

"I hear having your dimensional structure altered at the molecular level hurts worse than getting hit by a truck," he said. 

" _Yeah_ it does," Darcy said, but she was already trying to sit up.

"Lie back," Bruce said. "How are you feeling now?"

"Pretty great, actually," the girl said. "But strange."

"So why exactly did you drink this?" The doctor was looking at her now with exasperation.

The fairy was now nowhere in sight.

"Got it mixed up with my soda," she said. "I guess you were right about that being a bad idea."

Bruce facepalmed.

He was pretty sure Tony and/or Loki had something to do with this. But he wasn't going to try to drag it out of them.

There was science to do.

:)


	4. Prestidigitation, Pedagogy, Pyromania and Projection

Darcy had electrodes all over her and people standing around watching her as this blue dude tried to teach her how to focus magical energy. She wasn't sure how she felt about a lot of the stares. There was one dude named Nick Fury who was silently living up to his name from the corner by the door. 

"Don't worry, kid, he's always like that," said Tony, who was grinning like it was Christmas as his eyes took in the data from all the monitors.

Bruce wore a similarly eager but quieter look, which was definitely better than the exasperation he had worn a few minutes ago. Steve and Clint had come down to the lab too, and were watching from a distance with raised eyebrows, Cap's disbelief tinged with more wonder and Hawk's with skepticism. Apparently she was now more interesting than their video game.

This blue person, introduced to her as Joshua, was right in front of her and she couldn't read him. He was odd. Yes, he was an alien, but she'd met aliens before and Joshua was odd.

"You don't look like a Joshua," she told him. 

"You are supposed to be focusing," was the only answer he gave.

"I've never been good at focusing," she whined. "I wanna take a break. How did you get to be named Joshua anyway? Are you, like, from a planet of Judaic gods the way Thor is from a planet of Norse ones? If that's true why don't we hear about angels with blue skin or whatever?"

"Joshua is the name I chose for myself for the purpose of interacting with humans," Loki said. "It has no relation to my planet of origin."

"Why, don't you like it there?" Darcy asked.

Was that an uncontrolled reaction? It was so hard to read the strange red eyes but she thought so.

"Focus your energy. It should not be this difficult," he said, his voice gaining an edge of impatience.

"Got it, don't ask about the home planet. Well, I guess the fact that you live here is answer enough."

Loki groaned inwardly. This diversion was either proving too distracting or not distracting enough. He wasn't sure which. At least he wasn't feeling jealous of the moon hotel project any more.

"Perhaps this will help you focus," he said, causing a flame to appear in his hand.

"What the fuck!" Darcy shrieked. She gasped. "Give me a little warning before you...do whatever you just did. What _was_ that?"

"Your pardon. I didn't realize that would startle you so."

"I didn't just see it, I _felt_ it. That was the magic stuff?"

"I believe so."

"You _believe_ so? Have you ever taught anybody magic before?"

"Yes, I have, but she grew up surrounded by magic and knowing the feel of it. I'm realizing it was rather like teaching someone to write when they already speak the language, whereas _you_ barely understand the concept of words."

"Hey, don't get too personal, bozo. Maybe I can't do magic just yet, but if there's anything I can do it's talk."

"Yes, I can see that," he smiled. "It was simply the first simile that came to mind."

Darcy seemed satisfied with that. "All right, so tell me again what I'm supposed to be trying to do?"

"Simply to focus your magical energy. If you wish, you can try to replicate the spell that I just showed you. It's a simple elemental summoning."

"Make fire?" she said. She rubbed her hands together. "Okay, I'll give this a shot."

Darcy brought her hands together and frowned at the space between them.

There was a tremendous "FWOOM" and the room was filled with orange light.

"Wow." A slightly blackened Darcy blinked, then started to grin. "I did that? _Awesome._ "

"Well." Bruce sighed as he looked at a couple of fried wires. "I did not expect that when I set this up in my lab. No more tests today. I've got some cleaning up to do."

Darcy peeled the electrodes off of her head and arms, and noticed the black smudges that came with them. She raised her eyebrows. "Huh. Guess I'm not looking my best for all these cameras."

"Better than you have any right to." Tony looked delighted but confused. "Why does she get to keep her eyebrows? Whenever I accidentally induce flash combustion, I lose mine."

"A sorcerer's magic instinctually reacts to protect the body of the sorcerer from itself," Joshua explained. "If a spell is not specifically told to affect the sorcerer's body, it stops short at the magical field surrounding them."

"Hmm. I'm going to go wash my face but I'm a little afraid of myself right now. Josh, come with me?"

He nodded gravely and followed her out of the room.

Clint had edged away from the mages as they passed and now glowered at Darcy's back as she left. “It's bad enough having Tony on the team. No self discipline; he's like a kid who's gotten ahold of his dad's gun. Now we've got her, and she seems the same except she actually is a kid, and she's got all of Loki's powers. Fabulous. The Avengers is officially a super-powered insane asylum.”

Tony turned on him. “Shut it, you overgrown cupid. Pick on me all you want, I'm sure I deserve it, but leave her out of this. She's trying her best.”

“That's the problem, Stark. Everyone here is playing with more power than they know how to handle. You're playing with toys that could tear the world apart in a heartbeat. It's not exactly filling me with confidence.”

“Oh, you do not want to start this, Legolas. Just because you aren't man enough to handle real weaponry doesn't mean the rest of us have to make do with sticks and string.”

Clint's eyes narrowed, and he opened his mouth to retort, but Bruce spoke first.

“Gentlemen, if you want to have a shouting match, I suggest you take it elsewhere.” He looked at them pointedly. “But if you'd rather stay, cool it and listen.”

The other men turned to face Banner, emotion still clouding both their faces.

“I know why you're angry, Tony. Clint just pissed on your self image and you're trying to strike back. But he's not doing it because of you. Shake it off and try to be smart about this.”

Tony was silent, because this was the one person where the retort “easy for you to say” was just out of the question. He'd always respect what Bruce had to say because the man struggled every day with things Tony knew he couldn't handle, and still the man was frighteningly caring, unrelentingly good.

“And Clint,” Bruce continued. “You trust Tony with your life. You have since the Battle of Manhattan. What is this really about?”

Clint sighed and rubbed at his eyes with the heels of his hands. “It's just...I don't like things being out of control. Magic and monsters...it's Loki.” He looked at Tony. “I trust you. I've tried to trust Loki. But this all reminds me how much he can really do and how...terrifying it is to be at his mercy when even he isn't sure what he's going to do next.”

And none of them really had an answer to that.


	5. Cats, Cats, Cats, Cats, and Cats

Joshua stood by the door while Darcy washed her face in the bathroom sink.

"Am I just an idiot? Why can't I learn magic the way you expect me to?" she said, pouting at the mirror.

"My teacher's magic was different from mine, and my magic was different from my first student's," Joshua said gently. "She could do things I believed to be impossible. I have no doubt that you, also, will surprise me several more times before we are done."

"Did _she_ ever accidentally catch fire to a whole room full of expensive equipment?" Darcy asked plaintively as she walked out of the bathroom.

"No," said the elder mage with a distinctly amused smile, "but she did accidentally become ruler of a planet once."

" _Accidentally?_ "

"It was an entirely unexpected consequence of the unique qualities of her magic."

" _Accidentally._ Are you sure you know what that means? What was she _trying_ to do?"

Bruce broke in. "I'm starting to think it's in the nature of wizards to have a mind like a bag of cats."

Joshua smiled. "I would agree, but only under the condition that we hold to the older definition of the word 'wizard,' and admit that most of those present fall under that definition."

Tony frowned. "What definition would that be?"

Joshua came up behind Tony and wrapped his arms around the engineer, giving him an approving look. "Simply someone who is extraordinarily good at what they do, to the point of defying belief."

"That's not really a thing, is it? Jarvis, is that really a thing?" Tony asked the air.

"That is the second most common definition of the term 'wizard,' Sir," the AI replied.

Tony sighed and leaned back slightly into Joshua's arms. "I can't escape my wizardly destiny. I might as well wear robes and a pointy hat from now on."

"And accept ownership of your very own bag of cats," Joshua reminded him.

"Wait, what about cats?" Darcy asked, looking confused.

"It's an old joke," Bruce explained. "The first time I saw M&M...well, let's just say I recognized something of the way his mind was in conflict with itself. I tried to explain that to the others by saying his brain was like a bag of cats."

"Sounds fun. So how _did_ you guys meet?" She looked around the room as everyone kind of exchanged glances. "Somebody tell me about the mysterious blue dude, come on, I'm dying here!"

"Uh, well, I kinda sprung him out of a government holding cell where they were keeping him unjustly." Tony squeezed Josh's arm and looked up at him.

Joshua sighed. "To be fair, there _was_ a trial. And you have imprisoned people for far less."

Bruce pursed his lips thoughtfully. "Well, the rest of us know, and if she's going to be an Avenger with us, it doesn't seem fair not to tell her. Especially because she's a friend of Thor."

Darcy scowled. "Tell me what? What's this got to do with Thor?"

Josh looked her in the eye and said, "My name before I came to Earth...was Loki."

Darcy gaped. "Loki? Like, Thor's violently insane brother, Loki? You're kidding."

Steve frowned. "That's right. I know it must be difficult to accept, but...."

"No, no, it makes perfect sense!" She extended her hands, fingers spread, as if to encompass the universe and everything in it. "Especially after the whole crazy/brilliant thing. You're all crazy and your heads just kind of spew intersting dangerous stuff. Loki hanging around here? Makes all the sense."

Tony suddenly laughed, then he looked through his pockets. "Useless. The one time I really need sunglasses."

Clint sniggered. "I've got it, Stark." He pulled sunglasses out of his pocket. "Looks like..." he slipped them on. "The cat's out of the bag."

Darcy dissolved into helpless giggles.

Steve said, "Ok, what did I miss?"

"I'll fill you in later," Clint promised.

"So what now?" Darcy asked when she had recovered her breath.

Loki spoke, seemingly unaffected by the joke. "Untrained sorcerers can be dangerous. We should continue the training, regardless of the tests. If you're up for it, Miss Lewis."

Darcy tilted her head in thought. "Sure thing, Blue Man. I wanna figure this thing out as much as you want me to. I don't wanna disappear half the city in my sleep or anything."

"That is... _probably_ not going to happen." Loki gave a worried smile. "Shall we reconvene somewhere else?"

"My workshop is always a good place for experiments with a chance of fireballs," Tony volunteered. 

* * *

" _Focus,_ Darcy."

"I AM TRYING!"

They looked at the small blue fluff ball that Darcy was attempting to turn orange. She'd only caught it on fire once. The other attempts had been less impressive.

"What were you thinking about?"

"Cats?"

"Well don't do that."

Darcy thought determinedly, _don't think about cats,_ and tried again.

Oops.

Well, Loki wasn't going to be yelling at her any more for a while, at least.

Where the blue-skinned sorcerer had stood, there was now a startled black cat.

"Um," said Darcy.

Tony blinked at the cat.

"Uh," he said, equally intelligently.

"I didn't do it on purpose," Darcy squeaked.

"Yeah, I got that," said Clint. "But can you turn him back?"

As the silence extended, Tony's eyes turned on Darcy with speculation and a hint of anger.

"Okay, okay," she said, trying not to hyperventilate. "I'm just gonna try...doing what I just did. Again. But backwards? Or something."

She squeezed her eyes shut, and thought of handsome blue aliens.

When she opened them, Tony and the cat were still glaring at her.

"Ahh, what do I do, what do I dooooo?" She looked around the room at the onlookers, searching for guidance. "Learning magic is hard when your teacher suddenly can't use human language."

The cat huffed in agreement, then walked over to Tony and sniffed him curiously. Tony went cross-eyed with trying not to laugh. Then he reached out and delicately stroked Loki's black, furry nose. Loki leaned into his hand.

"OK wait, I'm going to try something else," Darcy said determinedly. "We were changing single qualities, right? So what if I just try to make you into a talking cat?"

Loki meandered out from under Tony's hand, back towards Darcy, and made a small, encouraging noise.

She didn't close her eyes this time, just sort of squinted, and waved her hand over Loki's black furry form, trying to feel the magic in him with her newly awakened sense.

_Language_ , she thought, and hit on a part of his nature that felt right for that concept. She caught hold of it and _tugged._

It was harder than she expected. But finally the essence gave under her force.

"Well, that," said the cat, "was definitely an impressive use of magic."

"It worked!" Darcy crowed. "I figured it out! Maybe I can really do this!"

"I believe you didn't exactly do what you meant to do," Loki said, sitting back on his furry black haunches. "If I am correct, you changed the form of 'cat' to include the quality of 'understands and speaks human language.'"

"Well, you can talk, right? So what did I do wrong?" Darcy said, worry starting to dull her excitement.

"You didn't manage to restrict yourself to _one_ cat." The small black creature narrowed his eyes in a smile. "I believe the news will be especially interesting tonight."

Darcy covered her mouth with her hands, not sure whether she was on the verge of laughter or panic.

Tony smiled and reached over to pet Loki again.

"Chaos enough for you, kitten?"

Loki bit Tony's finger gently, admonishingly, but then he began to purr.

* * *

They did have fun watching the news that night, which of course included people thinking they were dreaming, crazy, or that the world was ending. Three days later, after Loki had managed to get Darcy to turn him back into a Jotunn, he did change the definition of 'cat' back to its usual one.

But he still smiled mischievously whenever Darcy did something unpredictable with her magic.

And he never did get Tony to stop calling him 'kitten.'


	6. Rose Witch, Reminders, Reasons and Readiness

It was around a month later that everything had settled down. Darcy was more or less in control of, or at least conscious of, the different elements of her powers and what they could do. 

She'd been training with the Avengers, and they were starting to trust her, thinking maybe she'd be worth having in battle. So of course, she needed a suit.

Tony provided her with a set of under armor in a dark grey. Over that she decided on a warm, deep pink dress, cut low in the front to show the grey in a V shape, and with a thick black belt. The grey undersuit peeked out again at the knees like tights before a set of calf-length black boots with medium-high heels covered the rest. She tied a grey mask around her head that had holes for her eyes, then looked in the mirror.

"Classic," she said, and nodded. "Only one thing I still need to figure out. Gloves, or no gloves? I don't know, I'm not sold on the gloves, but without them it's just kind of a dress and a mask, you know? The gloves really say 'superhero'."

* * *

They'd won.

Tony tried not to think of it as a foregone conclusion. But in some ways, they had to win. There was no other alternative for the defenders of Earth.

He walked through the disassembly sequence, and into the penthouse level, to see that Loki and Darcy had gotten here ahead of him. They looked intact, but Darcy was clearly unhappy. He could hear her words as soon as he came inside.

"That was terrible, I totally freaked out, I was so useless. I should just go back to anthropology. This was a bad idea."

Mystery took hold of her shoulders. " _Nothing_ could be further from the truth. You handled yourself very well. You kept your head. Take it from someone with experience in completely losing perspective in a crisis and ruining everything. This was a good day. No one was injured because of you, and many were saved. You did very well."

Darcy scowled. "Of course _you'd_ say that. I'm your student."

Loki turned to his lover. "Tony, what does the public have to say?"

Tony flicked through news and media sites on the virtual screen in front of him. "'New female superhero rocks gender stereotypes yet again.' 'A second magic user joined the Avengers team in their battle today, lending her impressive powers to the rescue efforts.' Ooh, and you've got a press nickname already." Tony wrinkled his nose. "Not sure if you'll love it. Ready to hear?"

Darcy squared her shoulders. "Give me the worst."

"All right. You are now semi-officially known as 'Rose Witch.'"

Tony and Loki watched her face. Her expression was considering, and then she smiled. 

"That's actually...pretty rad," she said as she took off her gloves. She looked down at them. "Think I'm gonna keep these. Helps with the whole search-and-rescue aspect. I'd be pretty scraped up right now without them." She took a long breath. "All right. Rose Witch needs celebratory post-battle munchies. See you guys later!" And she left in the direction of the elevator and the Avengers' common kitchen.

"You're great at that," Tony said to Loki. "And it looks like you're having fun. If I didn't know better I'd think you planned this...." Tony chuckled.

Loki feigned innocence with a sparkle in his eye. "Me? Joshua Albastru? Up to mischief? Never."

"Of course not," Tony said, grinning. Then his smile softened. "You really are good at that. it reminds me of watching you with your daughter. I never expected to have kids, but...."

Loki's face went dark. "No. No more," he said, low and grinding. 

Tony raised his eyebrows. "Fine with me. Like I said, never pictured myself with a kid. No one wants a dad who forgets to leave his lab for a week, believe me. But you, you're good at it. Just thought you should know."

When Loki's expression didn't lighten, Tony went over and leaned an elbow on his shoulder, speaking flatly.

"What."

Loki sighed and began to speak.

"I never again want to feel so helpless as I did when Hel was dying. I never want to be in Odin's place, hearing what a mess I've made of a person's life. You never want to be in _your_ father's place, torn between the work that is your passion and your responsibilities to your family."

Loki turned to look at Tony then. "Notice something? Our reasons are good reasons but they are all negative ones."

"Yeah, and?" Tony responded.

"I don't recall either of us saying we don't _want_ children."

Tony surprised himself by not freaking out about that. Waking up next to Loki every morning for the past few months, he was getting used to the idea that _something_ in his life might last. So he looked Loki in the eye, and there was a calm understanding that some things they wanted, but they could not have.

Not _this_ millennium.

Tony smiled his 'idea' smile. Loki looked at him curiously.

"If I wake up one morning, a thousand years from now, and you're still next to me, maybe I'll bring it up again."

Loki looked at him, red eyes glowing, and then pulled Tony down into his lap and kissed him hard, and Tony wondered at how there could be even more said in one kiss than in the whole conversation before it.

 


End file.
